Today this is kind of my kickoff, I suppose, into working with people on money and money patterns. And for that kickoff, I want to explain to you my experience with being in the financial industry in the past. That is basically the majority of my career outside of working for myself. I've had a couple of other jobs, but most of my time was spent in the financial industry in different roles, so that's what we're going to talk about today.
The first thing that I want to get out in the open is that this isn't meant to be a bash by any means. It might come off like that at some points because my experience wasn't the best. I'm not here to call anybody out or anything like that.
I got into the financial industry by way of being hired as a college recruiter. What my job was, was to go to colleges, as well as call students to recruit them into our internship, and the internship was a baby version of being a financial representative. It was a way for you to learn what it's like to be a financial advisor and see if that's something that you want out of your life.
I was only paid maybe around $30,000 a year for this job and maybe that was fair market value, at least at the time. I'm not sure, but it was a pay decrease from the very first job I had out of college and I had to take it. I took it because it did sound interesting, but at the same time, I had been unemployed for a couple of months and I just had to take something.
For that $30,000 you were required to make daily phone calls to college kids to interview them, travel to schools, which for the most part, because of the area that I live in, most of the colleges that we went to were local. However, there were times where we traveled further away from where we would have to stay the night or even fly sometimes. It was a pretty fun job. Pretty low stress for the most part. I mean, you were hanging out with the interns because you're basically their babysitter. That was sort of fun because it made me feel like I was back in college again, to some degree.
I guess maybe that's one of the reasons why it was a lower-paying job, but at the same time, I felt like it should've paid a bit more but that's neither here nor there at this point. One of the interesting things about the position, and what it took to be successful at it, was that they did have it down to a science, where you needed to make a certain amount of calls and say a certain script. If you kept doing that daily, it should equal the desired amount of interns.
That's kind of attractive and I feel like a lot of people get into some positions or even some "be your own boss" kind of positions when they're promised a formula. If you follow it to a T you will get X, Y, Z results. That's going to be a theme throughout this conversation.
In this position, I was also around a lot of financial advisors and I saw what they did and how much money they made. It just seemed like a dream. It seemed like a "too good to be true" kind of thing. Plus, the advisors even had a very specific formula to follow, and if you followed that formula, you were successful. That was very, very attractive.
I was a recruiter for the internship for about six months and then I recruited myself into the financial representative role. There were a few reasons why I felt like that was a good move.
- When you're hired at that company, they give you a personality test that was created. specifically for the financial industry and the results suggested that I would be a good advisor.
- There were some things in the test that wasn't a perfect fit but they saw key things in there that were so positive that it could theoretically make up for the nonideal things.
- I also wanted to make the ridiculous amount of money that everyone was making. I mean, I feel like a lot of people see financial advisors, and they are dressed to the nines. They have the nicest cars, they have the biggest houses, they have everything that you could dream of wanting to have. That's very seductive.
- I knew I was meant to advise people in some way. I've known that since college. In fact, in college, I took a couple of personality tests and one told me to be a financial advisor. It was my number one career according to the test. I didn't know what it meant at the time. My number two was accountant, and I knew what that meant, so I decided to go in that direction.
- Long story short, I'm terrible at calculus. So I really didn't get to finish any kind of finance degree, but I did get a business degree and I found a love for business. However, I had this, this stuff in my brain, in my being, telling me I need to advise people.
- I found a very hidden interest in Financial Literacy. I felt very passionate about helping people expand their financial literacy because the people that I had been surrounded by for the majority of my life didn't really have it. Or at least I didn't think that they did. (I don't know regardless, but it felt like I was surrounded by lots of people that didn't really know much about money.)
- I also thought that if I followed the exact method that they taught, I would be successful and everything that they ever talked about suggested that. I thought that if I just do it their way then there's no way that I could fail.
So moving into the representative role was extremely exciting. The interview process was kind of more like a wine and dine situation. Mostly because the position is incredibly difficult because you're starting your own business. They even invited my partner to one of the interviews.
My partner and I didn't fully understand why he was being invited because to us, this is my decision, this is my career, so why would he really need to be involved in that discussion?
But really what it was is that ultimately, you're starting your own business and you're on full commission so your partner kind of needs to be on board.
You don't get any kind of salary or anything. What you sell is what you make and if you're in a partnership with someone. They kind of need to be on board or be on board at least to the extent that they understand that there will be times where you're not bringing in money. You're probably going to be working long hours and is that ultimately okay? Is that ultimately something that you can deal with, even if it's for a shorter period of time? Is that all right? 'Cause, it's a hard job and if you don't have support at home mentally, emotionally, and financially, then you're going to have a very hard time. Not impossible, but a hard time.
The company always said you'll never learn more about yourself than if you become a rep and that was extremely true. That's something that we hear today as well if you become an entrepreneur. It's pretty well-known that entrepreneurship is the ultimate personal development journey, or even a spiritual journey as well. Now this company wasn't talking about the spiritual aspects much. There were some glimmers of spirituality that were mostly presented as a mindset, a belief, as having faith.
So by the time I opened my online business, I was already very familiar with what this is going to be. A means to which I would be learning so much about myself.
Now, as a new financial rep, you're put in a six-week training program. So you have other classmates with you which is pretty nice, but from day one, it is basically feast or famine. They do give you a stipend for while you're training, but it's not very much. Just a couple of thousand, which may be enough for some people but by that point, I had a pretty established life and the shared expenses I had with my partner were more than that.
And of course, my partner was amazing during that time (he's still amazing during this time) so he would pick up the slack but what they don't tell you, and this is for any kind of entrepreneurial career, what they don't tell you about is the guilt that you have when you're not bringing in enough money.
The guilt that you have when you are not pulling your weight financially. Or even the anxiety. Well, they do talk about the anxiety of not making enough, but what's not talked about very often is just how responsible you feel for the fact that you are one part of a family and you are not financially "doing enough" yet. You're still working your ass off, but it's not paying financially quite yet so that was something that was not very well discussed. And I don't even know if that would have been helpful for them to even bring that up because then, why would anybody agree?
We had classmates, which is great because we had built-in moral support, motivation, and we were all in the same boat. Well, you're all building your own business so it's not like you're in the same, same boat, but you kind of were and it was also built-in competition.
As an athlete all my life, that was kind of nice, but this was about the time when I started noticing how I'm actually not that competitive. That was kind of a, almost like an identity shock. I didn't really want to compete against these other people so it wasn't a motivator for me to have higher sales than my classmate.
What I did not understand, and this was right off the bat, is that in your training, they did not teach you very much about financial planning. They taught you more about how to sell life insurance. Which makes sense and also doesn't make sense. Now don't get me wrong, you learn the basics. You learn the basics of all insurance products and you're only focusing on insurance because that is all you are legally allowed to sell as a financial representative.
In order to become a Financial Advisor, you have to pass tests that say that you can legally sell securities, which are investments and things like that. So, in your training, you learned some ins and outs of all insurance products but you didn't learn financial planning. It was really hard to grasp the full scope or the big picture of how all of this fits in someone's life. And maybe this was just my experience, but I did not feel confident that I would know exactly what that person needed.
If I were meeting with someone and I was trying to sell them some life insurance,
I did not fully understand exactly what they would need in the overall scope of their life and their life goals. But as a new rep, that wasn't your goal, which is bizarre! When you are a fresh baby financial representative, your goal is not necessarily about doing exactly what the client needs. Which sounds bizarre but hear me out.
It's not that you're going to be doing anything wrong by them because really what you're doing is you're selling them life insurance and I am a big proponent of everyone needing life insurance, even 19-year-olds. Now, there are ways to figure out what is the appropriate amount and they teach you those ways in your training. So by that logic, you're not doing anything wrong by them, technically because you are selling them a product that they do need, you are getting to a number that is realistic for them, but at the same time, you don't have the full scope of how it fits in the overall portfolio of this person.
To the company's credit, they emphasize the importance of working with a more experienced advisor. What that would look like is two people consulting with a potential client. This way, the new person could get the experience, they could see how the experienced advisor works, learn their tools, their tactics, but also learn the appropriate way to advise people on financial matters.
They certainly did encourage you to do that and I feel like that's probably one of the reasons why the initial training didn't go super deep into financial planning.
Because the whole name of the game in your first year of being a representative is to survive. It is to sell X amount of policies for you to survive and be successful. That's the only thing that you're meant to focus on and to focus on that, you need to bring in someone who is more experienced than you.
Now, what is annoying about that is that for one, you have to split the commission with that other advisor. And you know what? They don't need the money because they have been around for 20 years. They're fine financially. They don't need the money, but some advisors, they might have their own personal code of conduct where they won't split 50/ 50, they'll take a really small cut. However, not everybody's like that and the other thing with it is that a lot of experienced advisors are very busy, so they don't even have time to work with you.
I certainly wanted way more training on how to be a good advisor, not how to be a good salesman. But what was mega attractive about the whole thing is that they had a proven formula to equal out to success. Which, on one note, meant that they defined what success is. At that time, I really didn't have a grasp on the fact that you could define success for yourself. But regardless, it was just a big numbers game. That's what they boiled it down to.
You had to make 40 phone calls every day and through a whole statistical trickle-down situation, that would equal out to by six months, you should have sold 40 policies. And by one year you should have sold 100 policies. And if you did that, that should equal about making $100,000 in your first year.
It was all just a big mathematical equation that all started from make 40 phone calls every day. And those 40 phone calls were meant to schedule appointments. And so that would end up being by, their statistical breakdown, that you should have about six meetings every day. Six meetings a day, 30 meetings a week.
If you're an open or undefined sacral being, if you hear that and you're like, "Oh my God." You're right! It was just insane.
If you didn't hit that six-month mark with the 40 policies your chances of success diminished greatly because they had the data that proved that the chances of you surviving would greatly diminish. As a side note, I think I only lasted about three months before I found a different position in the company. I'll get into why that was a bit later. Well, it might've been a little bit longer. I think I was coming up to that six-month mark and could very easily see like I was not going to hit that goal so I decided to redirect.
But anyway, this really isn't supposed to be a bash on the company or even the industry. Yes, there is some fucked up shit going on with it but at the same time, they really did provide a lot of resources and a lot of support. Much of your homework was around personal development and mindset.
So, this is when I really started falling in love with personal development books, productivity hacks, and shit like that. Much of my mindset, my abundance mindset, any kind of positive outlook I have on retirement planning or, that it's possible to create a bigger life for yourself - all of that comes from that experience working in that company, trying my hand at being a financial representative.
One of the really cool things that they had us do is to write down what they called a "Design Statement". It was basically a full-page statement of what you had successfully created sometime in the future. It would saying something like "It's July 4th, 2022, and I have sold blah-blah-blah made blah, blah, blah. Yada, yada yada..."
You don't only put what you did in your career, but also what did that give you in your personal life as well? They really encourage you to read it every single day and even at your training graduation, you had to read yours out loud and they encourage you to write a new one almost every year, or at least once you got to that date that you had already set
But at that time, I was so skeptical of anything that resembled a mantra. I just did not think that that was helpful. I thought the design statement was cool that it gave you a way to create and write down your vision but I did not believe in the power of reading it every single day. So I did not do that. Maybe I would have had a different experience if I did, but probably not.
What really got to me was that your first year is just supposed to be a dead sprint. I hated that so much. I wanted to be able to take enough time to build relationships with potential clients. I really wanted to hone my craft. I wanted to know more about finance and how to plan and all of that. But when you are more focused on building relationships, as opposed to making sales. Do you know what you become, what you're called in that industry?
You're basically a professional lunch date.
That's it! You are just meeting people on the regular, having conversations, and never really closing anything and so you're just a professional date. And, if you were following the formula, like I said, you would have about six meetings every day. But here's, here's where it gets really fucked up. You were supposed to have six meetings a day and between those meetings, you were supposed to be able to make all 40 of your phone calls. Also, you need to be. able to get to every meeting which wasn't always in the office. (They definitely encourage you to do that, but it was fairly hard.) And you were supposed to have enough time to prepare what you needed for every meeting.
If you're a Projector, Manifestor, or a Reflector listening to this... yeah...it's nearly impossible. I mean, that's probably not true but it was absolutely wrecking my body and my nervous system as a projector, trying to do all of that. I really could not understand how, how is that possible?
And you know how it's possible? You work 15 to 20 hours a day! That's how it's possible! Or you just do your stuff extremely fast day in and day out. Those are the only two ways.
Anyway, they really encourage you to schedule your meetings in the office, which would obviously reduce your drive time because you're not driving anywhere. But that usually didn't happen because no one wants to be sold to on someone else's turf. So a lot of times, the only way that you could get a meeting is if you suggested that you go to them.
By month six, if you make it that far, and if you sold those 40 policies like you were "supposed to", they would encourage you to hire an assistant. Obviously, that would be out of your own pocket because you are your own business owner. But they encourage it because you need one, you really need one! But until then they do give you access to a group of people who were basically a group of assistants for all of the reps.
So they would do all of your meeting prep for you, but if you don't know how to financially plan, you don't really know what to tell them to prepare for you. So it was almost useless because then you're trying to do both. You want to do your own prep for a while, so you can really learn what you're actually doing but then you don't really have enough time so you have to give that off to people immediately. Then you're really not fully learning exactly what your job is.
So getting an assistant would obviously be great, especially if you're having six meetings every day, and having to make 40 phone calls, but you're not making very much money at all. Even by month six, and you hit the checkpoint that you were supposed to, you're still not making very much money.
Then you have people like me who were energetically drowning just in the first month, not being able to fully keep up from an energetic standpoint. So an assistant from day one would have really helped me but it's not like I could have paid for it. However, this is where I really learned the lesson that sometimes you have to spend money on help to make even more money. I never got to actually do that but that was a lot of the mindset that was taught. I could really see the validity in that even if I didn't personally have that experience. I did see it in action in other people.
This is also about when I started thinking that maybe I'm not meant to be an advisor but maybe an advisor's assistant. I started letting go of the idea that I had what it took to be my own boss. I started letting go of the idea that I wanted to make lots of money. I started letting go of the dreams that I had previously held of helping people with their finances and being very well compensated for it.
Here's what was happening.
I would have the worst anxiety going to bed, mostly because I dreaded waking up the next day. I hated making phone calls and I really didn't physically have a large enough list to where I could make 40 phone calls every day, which is your whole business model. This model was all dependent on you knowing enough people and knowing enough people with good money. I'm from a little Southeast Missouri town. I don't know people. I don't know enough people and I don't know enough people with lots of money. Now, I will say though, there was one woman in the office who was fucking amazing. She was a beast. She had a very similar small-town upbringing that I had and so there went that excuse out the window. It was really frustrating, to be honest.
So I hated making the phone calls. I started mentally checking out of everything in my life except for work. But at the same time, I was finding it very, very difficult, to physically do my job because I was just so overridden with anxiety. My relationship with my partner was deteriorating. I couldn't pay my bills. I was making lots of enemies through these phone calls. I pissed off a lot of my high school classmates. I really felt like a leech. Like it felt like anywhere that I was, I was constantly thinking, "I need to get their phone number. I need to find out if I can sell to them.". I just felt like people could feel that from me and they could.
Now that I know that I'm a projector, all of that makes sense but it was no way for me to live. I felt terrible 100% of the time. But at the same time, as I said, they really worked with you on your mindset, which basically made everything that I listed off sound like excuses. This was so frustrating because you really do want to work on your mindset, your approach to life, and things like that. You do really want to reduce your excuses. Like, don't make excuses for yourself. If you want something. Figure it out. And that's true for any design type. You can figure it out and still be aligned with your design. It is very true. It's just, you have to figure it out for your own way.
It's really frustrating that on the one hand, learning mindset techniques is powerful and helpful, but at the same time, depending on the way that they're used, they can be weapons. And that's the same thing with spiritual practices and teachings, too. Eventually, in another episode, I'm going to be sharing my experience with that very thing. Someone weaponized a spiritual teaching to convince me to buy their shit. I didn't end up buying their shit but it did get me for a moment.
But make to the matter at hand.
There are plenty of mindset teachings that I learned during that time and I'm still using today, so I'm going to list them out here. There are quite a few.
- Those aren't your people. So anyone you're pissing off or anybody that doesn't want to buy from you or whatever, they're not your people.
- Don't let other people's judgment get in the way of your own growth.
- You are doing big things, which makes other people judge you.
- How other people feel about you and your career is more of a reflection of them and their fear. It's not a reflection of you.
- If you know this one action leads to income, why wouldn't you keep doing it? Now, let me explain that one a little bit, because like I said, this whole business model was boiled down into a formula of what you have to do. Basically, as I said before, what it boiled down to is it all starts with phone calls, make your 40 phone calls and then everything should shake out correctly. There was this teaching that essentially said "Every phone call is you accessing a cash register. So why wouldn't you make more and more phone calls if you were able to get into the cash register every single time?". Now, obviously not every phone call equaled a sale or even a meeting. That's not the point. It's a numbers game. So all you have to do is play the numbers game.
- You can have a solid retirement plan without being rich. You just have to start early. That's it. You just have to start early. The more time that you put into your plan, the more time that you contribute to your plan, the better. You don't have to be a millionaire to have a solid retirement. You just gotta be smart. Or know smart people to help you with it.
- Dream big, but also, take action toward that dream. I feel like a lot of people forget that last part. I know I do.
Now, there were a few that I did learn that I don't use. They are:
- It's just a numbers game. I don't use that now. I can see how it might still be relevant. I definitely think it was relevant in the past but we are shifting. It's not really a numbers game anymore. I know people are going to listen to that and say that that's bullshit but it's not. It is more about the energy that you put into it and your intent.
- So something that I recognized about my experience with this is why I got into that position in the first place. Most of it was driven by the financial gain that I would ideally have. However, I found out that I'm actually not money motivated. I knew that if I just did X, Y, Z, I would make tons of money eventually, and yet, I didn't want to do that because those actions did not sit well with me.
- Then I also learned, which I think at that time it was subconscious, but over time it became more conscious, that if you do things just for the money, it will not work in some way. That's "some way" can be different for everyone and that's where it becomes really important to define success for yourself. I know there's plenty of people that got into that industry just for financial gain and they received that financial gain. However, their personal life is shit. They're overworked. They're depressed. They're not doing the things that they actually want to do. Sure they got the money they wanted, but did they get anything else they wanted? Did they get anything else that they needed?
- Following a proven formula equals success. Nope! Absolutely not. Well, okay. Let me break it down a little bit more. If you are the type of person that that particular formula works for, then sure!
- You need to work really, really, really, really, really hard for 20 years so you can play for the rest of your life. My challenge to that is, "Why wouldn't you want to have fun in the first 20 years?" I also think that it's still possible to have fun and make lots of money so that's why I don't really subscribe to that.
I moved into being an assistant for an advisor and he had his business for at least, I think 10 years or so. He was very well-established and I worked for him for about a year. That is actually where all of my financial knowledge really came from. That was where I got to learn what I wanted to learn and get to see it in practice. That experience did distill in me that I am more of an assistant and not an owner. So that wasn't the best. That experience had some really high highs, but also really low lows.
It was nice to be on a steady income. That was very good for my nervous system. And I did learn a lot financially and I loved every minute of that. But even when you're an advisor's assistant, you still kind of are working just as hard as the advisor. In the sense that if the advisor is go, go, go, you also have to be go, go, go. I know that seems obvious and I know that that might even sound like there shouldn't be a problem with that. But when you don't know that you're a Projector and you're trying to live your life like a generator...that's why I only lasted with him for a year. My anxiety was still extremely high. My stress level was still really high. None of that stress was money-related because I was being taken care of in the form of a regular salary, but, he was paying me directly from his pocket. So, there were times that I let him dock my pay because I fucked something up. I would feel so bad that I fucked his pay so I let him fuck with mine.
Even though I'm I know that I'm a good support person, and I can do that job and I can tell what people need, I mean, I am a projector, I also don't like being told what to do. That was one of the reasons why that didn't last. I did not want to do the job the way he wanted me to do it. There were definitely some components of it that I was like, "yeah, I got you. I know you want it this way. I'm going to do it this way". But there were other components of the job where I knew there was a more efficient way, but he wasn't letting me make it more efficient because he just wanted to keep doing it in a certain way.
Now that I know I'm a projector, looking back on that time, everything makes so much more sense. It made so much sense as to why I nearly hated myself. Projectors are here to wait for recognition and an invitation. In my body, I knew that. I knew that I was not made to go out and find people. I was not made to go cold-call people. I knew that. But I didn't consciously know that. The shitty thing was, you "weren't allowed" to build your business in any other way that was taught so you had no support in finding a different way to build your business.
So now that I had the awareness that I was initiating all kinds of shit all the time...I know people could feel how wrong it was on me. That experience taught me a lot about energetics and I think I'm realizing that right now in this moment. Even before having any kind of awareness of Human Design, my experience in that industry taught me so much about energetics. It really does matter what energy you show up with and it really does matter that you stay true to how your energy works. People can feel when you're being something that you're not. People can feel when you just want the money.
That was so frustrating too, because I did, and still do, have a really intense passion for financial literacy and being smart with your overall plan. I fully believe in insurance, as well as investments, you need both. If you have the insurance, then you can be riskier with your investments. But what was so annoying and frustrating was that I didn't feel like I had the time to be able to really help people understand what they needed because I was supposed to make it a sales pitch and then they were just, they were supposed to agree.
Sure, they taught you how to respond to objections but when you're so passionate about the importance of the products and people are opposing you - that's just not how I work very well. The people I would talk to were in their early 20s and didn't think they needed insurance, which that is a whole issue on its own. Side note, if you want to be a financial representative, you probably should start that career in your late twenties to early thirties so that you'll be selling to people around that age and they're ready to listen a little more.
But when people are not listening to me about the logic and the reason why this is a good idea and I really don't just want your money...I mean, I want your money because I'm about to starve, but also, more than that...you do need this but I can't convince you that you need it because you just think I want your money. And then that would put me into like a fight mode. I just wanted to fistfight people. I wanted to yell at them and to tell them that they were being stupid, and I just want to make their life easier. And also I want to eat, dammit!
So on my exit interview to leave that position and move into the assistant role, I told the guy that ran the whole office that I learned that I'm not articulate enough, that I'm too spirited about this and that I can't convince people of what is necessary because I get too angry when they're not listening. He didn't really have much to say to that. Which is kind of sad. It might've been helpful. But whatever, that's neither here nor there at this point. But now I'm looking at things and getting back into the money conversations, I'm so excited and I don't have those feelings at this point of wanting to punch people in the face if they don't listen to me because I feel like I'm finally able to go about it in the way that I always wanted to.
I get to take my time to really build a relationship. I get to help people through the energy of money and not just the management of money. That's a whole other thing, too. Now retrospectively looking back to all the people that I tried to work with, I see that they were not in a place emotionally or energetically to really understand what was going on. Some people were afraid to take the action step because of their fears with money and I think that's a big reason why I couldn't end up making the sales that I needed to make.
I didn't have enough awareness about the energetics of money and that definitely wasn't where the training was at all. So I really wasn't equipped to be able to talk through those things with people but when I look back on it, it really was an issue of not being able to get to someone to the core.
Long-term financial planning can be very hard if you are unfamiliar with the energetics of money and you're not in a good place with your relationship with money. It can be really hard to feel comfortable with long-term planning because you're in a here and now instead of visualizing what is possible over time. It's about knowing that what you put out now can come back later. That's basically what long-term financial planning is. But when you are in a fight or flight kind of mode with money, later is way later. It's almost impossible for you to think about that as something that will happen one day because it seems so far away that you can't think about that right now because there are more important immediate needs.
I was not equipped to be able to talk about those things and also, they did not create an environment where that would be a viable conversation.
Now I get to basically be the advisor I've always wanted to be and that is to not actually be an advisor. I'm calling myself a money guide because I'm not going to be attached to any financial company or financial products or anything like that. I do want to continue my education on financial products and be able to guide people in those decisions. I'll take this moment to say that whatever advice I may share is not meant to be taken as fact because I'm not legally licensed to advise you on it. So, you know, with that, maybe I will consider that one day but right now, what I want to focus on the most is the energetics and not necessarily the tactical planning. I really want to focus on the energetics of money
because I definitely believe that you need to get that situated before you can feel comfortable managing your money.
Lastly, what I'd like to share is that I will be opening up a new service called Money Alchemy Sessions. They're not open yet, but I do have a waitlist up so if you are interested in being notified when those go live, I would suggest getting on the waitlist.
Money Alchemy Sessions are sessions that illuminate the energetics that you are already working with, with money. So we will look at your Astrology and we will look at your Human Design. What patterns are there from a monetary perspective? There are some really powerful things to look at within both charts that really help us understand what you're working with, what your blind spots are, as well as what your strengths are.
So, if that is something that you feel would be helpful to you, I highly suggest getting on the waitlist so that you can be notified when they're live.
I really hope that this was helpful to you! If this spurred any thoughts, comments, or questions, I'd love to hear them! Shoot me an email at [email protected]